8.04.2009

5 hours ago

I was at what felt like my lowest point since that fateful ultrasound (us) in 2007. I had went to my fertility dr, Dr.H, on monday he once again said everything was looking promising blah blah and after the us he told me he was ordering an HCG shot (forces ovulation) so I call the company this morning and ask when my shot will arrive. They have no recent record of a shot being oredered. I leave a messgae with the dr and I get a nasty call from the nurse saying he ordered me an ovulation test kit, not an HCG shot. All day I've wondered how i could make such a critical mistake, and how stuff just wasn't adding up. 5 hours ago i felt nothing but sorrow and guilt for myself. I felt worse than the dog you-know-up DWG throws over the fence. Then about 4 hours ao the dr calls and said that he was incredibly sorry, I was right i did need that shot. HELLO! I'm no dr but why did i need to predict ovulation when i had an egg almost big enough! GAH! THis is not the first mistake that the dr has made and they're kind of a big deal. all that's in my brain now is, did he make a mistake and maybe he could have saved my baby? I pray that i will act like a Christian woman tomorrow and not a homegrown hillbilly. I will also be looking for a new dr against DWG's wishes. One thing that I have learned from all of this is that I am blessed to have the ability to get this far, this road is in no way pleasant or easy but there are people far worse off than I am.

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