Day 1

I think that yesterday brought me the biggest heartbreak that I've had since my babies went to Heaven. I don't understand how everything looks perfect and I give up Coke Zero, then it doesn't work. I'm not ready to give up and quit but I am feeling beat the heck down. I want my humor and my life back. Instead all I can think about is the incredible pain I'll be in in 12 days. So today I am drinking my last Coke Zero again and jumping in with both feet, getting my hopes up, and hopfully in the end the only thing that hurts is my knees from praying like my life depends on it.